Understanding and Accepting Anger
Anger is a natural reaction to hurt, but many of us are taught to repress it. This blog explores how to understand and accept anger as a valid emotion.
Dr. Nicole LePera
#1 New York Times Bestselling Author “How To Do The Work”(https://t.co/HF3UY9ia4Q) Founder of @selfhealerscirc 👇🏼Join Waitlist 👇🏼
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When you come out of survival mode, you might feel really angry.
— Dr. Nicole LePera (@Theholisticpsyc) June 21, 2023
Anger is your body coming back to life: -
We're taught to repress our anger. To ignore it. And to deny it to seem "polite." Some of us were even punished for feeling angry. We were told to be "good" and after all, good girls/boys don't get angry.
— Dr. Nicole LePera (@Theholisticpsyc) June 21, 2023 -
When we're hurt over and over again and then punished for having a natural reaction of anger, we dissociate. We leave our bodies.
— Dr. Nicole LePera (@Theholisticpsyc) June 21, 2023
Our body goes into survival mode and we're numb. -
Over the years, we lose our agency. We allow treatment and behaviors that are hurtful or abusive. We don't tell people to stop. We fear saying no.
— Dr. Nicole LePera (@Theholisticpsyc) June 21, 2023
Rage begins to bubble under the surface. -
Some of us take that rage out on ourselves.
— Dr. Nicole LePera (@Theholisticpsyc) June 21, 2023
We punish ourselves through:
-restrictive eating
-self shaming
-addictive behaviors.
Rage has to go somewhere. And specifically for women, it's safer for that rage to go inwards. -
As you start healing and slowly leave survival mode, you might:
— Dr. Nicole LePera (@Theholisticpsyc) June 21, 2023
-feel intense rage over how you were treated in the past
-fantasize about revenge
-be furious that people didn't help/protect you
-start sobbing out of nowhere (released rage) -
This is a good sign that you're no longer numb. That you're ready to protect yourself. And that you're becoming conscious enough to set clear boundaries around behavior.
— Dr. Nicole LePera (@Theholisticpsyc) June 21, 2023 -
Anger is our internal voice telling us that something is wrong.
— Dr. Nicole LePera (@Theholisticpsyc) June 21, 2023
We can welcome it and use it to finally say:
"NO."
"That's enough."
"I won't accept this."
"I am removing myself"
"I won't be treated this way"
"Don't pressure me again" -
Anger will come up again and again as we heal. It's our biological protective response. We no longer have to hide it or repress it. We no longer have to silence it for the comfort of another.
— Dr. Nicole LePera (@Theholisticpsyc) June 21, 2023
We can allow our anger to guide us into safety. -
Retweet and bookmark if this resonated.
— Dr. Nicole LePera (@Theholisticpsyc) June 21, 2023
What is your relationship to your own anger.
Share in the comments.
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