8 Ways To Support Someone When They're Struggling

8 Ways To Support Someone When They're Really Struggling:

— Dr. Nicole LePera (@Theholisticpsyc) March 6, 2023

1. Ask: "How Can I support you right now?"

They might not know and that's ok. Let them know you're available to listen.

— Dr. Nicole LePera (@Theholisticpsyc) March 6, 2023

2. Resist trying to fix it

Don't give unsolicited advice or tell them what you would do, it will feel invalidating even when it comes from a well-meaning place.

— Dr. Nicole LePera (@Theholisticpsyc) March 6, 2023

3. Don't try to give a new perspective

- "it was meant to happen"
- "you're better off"
- "we don't get more than we can handle in life"

This never feels good for the person struggling, it's actually for us because we feel uncomfortable.

— Dr. Nicole LePera (@Theholisticpsyc) March 6, 2023

4. Validate their perspective

When they share, validate what they're saying "I can't imagine how painful that was. What else were you feeling?"

— Dr. Nicole LePera (@Theholisticpsyc) March 6, 2023

4. Keep everything private

It's a boundary violation to share what's going on in someone's life without permission. Don't share what is shared with you.

— Dr. Nicole LePera (@Theholisticpsyc) March 6, 2023

5. Check in: "I'm here if or when you need me"

Letting someone know you're there and that they're not alone is a beautiful way to show support.

— Dr. Nicole LePera (@Theholisticpsyc) March 6, 2023

6. Don't compare

Don't push someone to do something or compare them to another person. Everyone grieves and processes things in different ways.

— Dr. Nicole LePera (@Theholisticpsyc) March 6, 2023

7. Offer to make something easier

- "Can I send groceries over to your house, would that help at all?"
- "Do you want me to come over to walk your dog?"
- "What can I take off your plate?"

— Dr. Nicole LePera (@Theholisticpsyc) March 6, 2023

8. Don't take it personally

Some people shut down, say things they wouldn't normally say, or don't seem 'appreciative' when struggling. This isn't personal.

— Dr. Nicole LePera (@Theholisticpsyc) March 6, 2023

Remember, a lot will come up with you when you watch someone you love struggle.

Don't ignore these emotions. Allow them. Just notice what comes up. And make sure you're also taking care of you.

Do you have people who care for you in this way?

— Dr. Nicole LePera (@Theholisticpsyc) March 6, 2023