Making Friends After College: How to Overcome the Challenge

Many people find it impossible to make friends after college.

But, it doesn't have to be this way.

Here's How to Make Friends:

— Clint Murphy (@IAmClintMurphy) March 21, 2023

• The Problem

It's easy to make friends when we're young.

We're automatically put in cohorts:

• Sports
• Classmates
• Work colleagues
• Hobbies and meetups

As we age, we move to the suburbs, get busy with work, have kids and lose time for new friends.

We can fix this!

— Clint Murphy (@IAmClintMurphy) March 21, 2023

• The Solution

When Nick Gray moved to New York, he didn't know anybody.

He wasn't successful at networking events and didn't enjoy bars or nightclubs.

He started to experiment with how to bring the party to him and after hundreds of hours of trial and error, he found it... pic.twitter.com/rbfUCwdtO1

— Clint Murphy (@IAmClintMurphy) March 21, 2023

• Cocktail Parties

A cocktail party is a lightweight social gathering with low commitment.

People know they'll have a lot of little conversations through the night.

And, the requirements are much simpler than a dinner party - you get 80% of the results with 20% of the work.

— Clint Murphy (@IAmClintMurphy) March 21, 2023

• Host Benefits

As the host, you'll:

• Boost your reputation
• Meet awesome people
• Strengthen relationships

You'll increase your network of acquaintances and the strength of these weak ties will serve you.

These ties will 3x your likelihood of finding your next job.

— Clint Murphy (@IAmClintMurphy) March 21, 2023

• Host Them at Home

A Barty (birthday party at a bar) generally sucks:

• Noisy - hard to talk
• Can't control the crowd or feel
• Ordering drinks is too transactional

Host the parties at home:

• More intimate
• You control the space
• You'll have more confidence

— Clint Murphy (@IAmClintMurphy) March 21, 2023

• How to Invite Guests

Start by inviting your core group:

• Friends
• Neigbors
• Colleagues

Once you've received a certain number of confirmations, then expand your invite to target other Great Guests.

Aim for 15 confirmed guests for your first party.

— Clint Murphy (@IAmClintMurphy) March 21, 2023

• Timelines and Gameplan

Avoid the Heavyweight Days:

• Tuesday - Sunday
• Holidays & Long Weekends

Target Monday - Wednesday and make it a defined time, ideally 7:00 to 9:00.

When you provide a clear start and end time and stick to it, people will come more often.

— Clint Murphy (@IAmClintMurphy) March 21, 2023

• Nametags

If you use nametags, you make the party easier:

• Reduce social anxiety
• Place everyone on equal footing
• A safe opportunity to approach strangers

Stick to the rule.

Make sure it applies to everyone.

Be clear up front and be consistent in enforcement.

— Clint Murphy (@IAmClintMurphy) March 21, 2023

• Ice Breakers

Icebreakers don't have to only be for college or work - they help people to get to know each other.

Start by asking three questions:

• Name
• What you do for work
• What's your favorite breakfast

Icebreakers help shuffle the room and circulate guests.

— Clint Murphy (@IAmClintMurphy) March 21, 2023

This thread is based on my convo with Nick Gray on the Growth Guide Podcast & his book, the 2-Hour Cocktail Party.

You can learn more about Nick here:https://t.co/EG0pz0xJs5

You can listen to us here:https://t.co/A83deODwvm

I've seen Nick host a party in person - It WORKS!

— Clint Murphy (@IAmClintMurphy) March 21, 2023

That's a Cheat Sheet on "How to Make Friends" when you're an Adult.

If you got value out of this thread:
1. Follow me @IAmClintMurphy for more of these
2. RT the tweet below to share with your friendshttps://t.co/ccuI5qbV58

— Clint Murphy (@IAmClintMurphy) March 21, 2023