The Life Dinner: A Monthly Check-In Ritual for Couples

My wife and I recently started a monthly check-in ritual.

It’s been incredible for our relationship.

The Life Dinner:

— Sahil Bloom (@SahilBloom) April 5, 2023

I first came across the concept of the Life Dinner from entrepreneur Brad Feld.

The idea is simple:

A fixed monthly date to sit down for a meal with your partner to reflect on personal, professional, and relationship progress, challenges, and goals.

— Sahil Bloom (@SahilBloom) April 5, 2023

Over time, your life becomes increasingly hectic.

After our son was born in May 2022, this fact was top-of-mind for both of us.

It becomes easy to allow your relationship with your partner to sit on the back-burner while you deal with the more pressing fires of day-to-day life.

— Sahil Bloom (@SahilBloom) April 5, 2023

While this may seem ok in the short-term, it can easily lead to problems in the long-term.

The Life Dinner is a thoughtful approach to keep your relationship thriving despite the time constraints and stresses of daily life.

— Sahil Bloom (@SahilBloom) April 5, 2023

A few specifics for conducting your own Life Dinner ritual:

• Set a recurring monthly date
• Pick a favorite spot, explore a new place, or cook a meal at home
• If you don’t have time for a full meal, do it over a coffee or drink

Make it a sacred monthly ritual.

— Sahil Bloom (@SahilBloom) April 5, 2023

Three areas to cover in discussion:

• Personal
• Professional
• Relationship.

Within each area, each person should have the floor to reflect on the prior month's progress and challenges, as well as forward-looking goals.

— Sahil Bloom (@SahilBloom) April 5, 2023

After each person has their time, you can discuss key items as a team.

The goal is to give each person time to speak freely before opening it up for a joint discussion.

— Sahil Bloom (@SahilBloom) April 5, 2023

My wife and I love the Life Dinner because it creates a structure through which we can grow together.

Since we had our son in May 2022, it's been a critical part of our "system" for ensuring we continue to grow together despite the chaos of having a newborn in the house. pic.twitter.com/AOdpBKukeO

— Sahil Bloom (@SahilBloom) April 5, 2023

If you're in a relationship, I'd encourage you to give the Life Dinner a shot.

At worst, you get a nice meal together—but I'm guessing you'll get much more out of it than that!

Follow me @SahilBloom for more and RT the first tweet to share it with others. https://t.co/hOSq8hLLmC

— Sahil Bloom (@SahilBloom) April 5, 2023

One pushback is that you should just talk daily and not need a “system” for your relationship.

If you’ve been married for years, have kids, and still find time for deeper discussions daily, more power to you.

I don’t think that’s the norm, though—this would help most couples.

— Sahil Bloom (@SahilBloom) April 5, 2023

One other note:

The Life Dinner isn’t intended to *replace* normal daily discussions and conversations.

It’s silly to think that doing one means you aren’t talking daily.

It’s just a way to guarantee these deeper, personal, 1-on-1 discussions are happening on a regular basis.

— Sahil Bloom (@SahilBloom) April 5, 2023

Also, if you feel the need to reply to people you don’t know with bad faith stuff like this, you should probably do some soul searching. pic.twitter.com/yglvnxOgpj

— Sahil Bloom (@SahilBloom) April 5, 2023

P.S. I write about topics related to growth, health, and wealth in my 2x weekly newsletter.

Join 300,000+ others who receive it here! https://t.co/32basvHgSr

— Sahil Bloom (@SahilBloom) April 5, 2023

Here’s the original blog post from Brad Feld explaining the Life Dinner concept.

Worth a read if you want to go deeper! https://t.co/mBdqR7gyie

— Sahil Bloom (@SahilBloom) April 5, 2023

Anytime someone tries to draw me into an argument on Twitter, I have two options:

A) Argue on Twitter
B) Do literally anything else with my life

Path B always wins out.

🫡🫡🫡 pic.twitter.com/y7kvUdNvBG

— Sahil Bloom (@SahilBloom) April 5, 2023